You Go Where You Focus…

Quote:

“Contentment isn’t a feeling, it’s a focus.”

~Wade Joye

Scripture:

I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.  I can do all this through Him who gives me strength.

~Philippians 4:12-13

Perspective:

Have you ever thought, “When I get XYZ, then  I will be happy?”  I have, too many times to mention!  Looking back, I don’t even remember what most of the things were that I was waiting for to make  me happy; clearly that happiness I waited for did not last long before I was waiting for the next thing that I was sure would bring me happiness.  After the roller coaster of having plenty then not, then plenty being at our fingertips again then not, repeatedly until our financial crisis hit in 2016, I learned a valuable lesson: happiness does not come from things going in the direction that we consider well, what we want, or our way.  And when it does, it is short lived until the wave of happiness we waited for takes us under, sometimes making us feel as if we are going to drown.  Happiness has its roots in our perspective, or point of view, of how we choose to look at things.

This past weekend my 12-year-old son, who plays travel soccer, had a game 2-1/2 hours away.  Because he has now added wrestling to his busy schedule, he wanted to skip that particular game, but we would not let him.  His team played a great first half, but not such a great second half, missing out on numerous potential goals.  The game ended in a tie.  Usually Luc is fairly easy-going, but after this tied game he was upset.  He went on for a few minutes about the drive being a waste of time just to tie and how they didn’t play as good as they could and should have, until I stopped him.  Not everything we do in life is a win, but everything we do in life is a lesson and an opportunity for us to do better the next time.  His perspective was of his choosing, as it always is for all of us!  He could choose to spend his day miserable and grumbling, which would accomplish nothing but a ruined and wasted day, OR, acknowledge his disappointment over tying, ponder how he personally can do better the next time, and move on, enjoying the beautiful fall day in the mountains and lunch with his parents.  Luckily for his sake (and ours ; ), he chose the latter; he was resilient and so bounced back from the disappointment.

In life, we have that choice often throughout each day!  Will we let all the little things, or even the bigger things, that don’t go our way, the way we believe we deserve  them to and the way that will make  us happy, disrupt our mood and our progress?  Or, will we learn whatever lessons we can from the many adversities we have faced, are facing, and will face in the future?  Will we choose to learn and grow from the many lessons in life each and every day, choosing to focus on being content despite adversity?  Our perspective is our choice, whether it feels like it or not.  Remember, feelings are not only fleeting, but also deceptive.  Do not rely on a feeling, but rather on your logic, on your ability to reason.  There is a gap between thoughts and feelings, feelings and actions, and then actions and thoughts, even when it doesn’t feel like it, and we have a choice what to do in that gap.  Our choices are one of the few things we truly have control over in this life, so why not take advantage of that fact and let our choices help guide us down the life path we want to take. 

Something that has really created a positive change for me is trusting that God has a plan for my life, whether I understand it or not, and as I have sought His plan, I have felt a sense of  contentment, peace, and security like never before, through whatever life has thrown at me.  Steven Furtick says, we equate love with comfort, God equates it with trust.  Faith is defined as complete trust based on spiritual apprehension as opposed to concrete proof.  God acts in our faith, in our trust in Him He works all things for our good…in His perfect timing, not ours.  During our “financial crisis of 2016-17,” I learned to surrender to God and put all my trust in what He could do, NOT in what we could do, we had been on that hamster wheel far too long.  From doing so, I felt an unexplainable peace and sense of contentment despite our circumstances; today neither my husband nor I would trade what we went through for our much-developed mindset!  

Life Application:

Plan for today: whenever you begin to feel frustrated, disappointed, or angry about anything you are facing, flip it, and look at what you can learn in that moment to not only grow but to make the situation better.  Don’t let a slip up derail you, but rather stay committed throughout the day.  Then, recommit again tomorrow.  Any positive change we want to make is a daily, sometimes even an hourly (or less!), recommitment!