The Back-to-School Edition…

Quote:

“…remind yourself that the only thing you can truly control is you – and your reaction to what the world throws at you.”

~Patrick M. Ryan

Scripture:

Be strong and courageous.  Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you.  He will not leave you or forsake you.

~Deuteronomy 31:6

Perspective:

2020 has been the perfect year to stir up our negative thoughts and thus feelings.  It seems like one negative thing after another has made headlines, especially COVID-19, which has continued to wreak havoc throughout the world and in our individual lives.  The Coronavirus has caused so many changes, unfortunately none of them feel like a positive.  We’ve been physically isolated and many things we looked forward to have been cancelled and are still being postponed and cancelled today.  We have a right to have a multitude of feelings about all that has transpired, including sadness, worry, anxiety, disappointment, and even anger.  All feelings are OK, it is what we do with them that matters!  We may even be mourning the many losses that we have experienced across the different areas of our life, and that can often be a process.  Like it or not, our current situation is the new normal, at least for this season of life.  It is one for the history books and something we will remember and tell stories about for generations to come.  But there is always someone we can count on, for Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever (Hebrews 13:8).

No matter our situation, we have choices!  We are all in this together and we will make it through this hard situation just like any we have been through and survived in the past.  And, we do not need to just survive, we can thrive, we can grow through this (and any) trial.  There are things we can do to make this feel easier than it might otherwise.  There is this little thing you control that has a big impact…your attitude.  Charles Swindoll said,  

“Attitude is everything!  Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it.” 

We cannot control other people, what life throws at us, or what happens around us, but the good news is we CAN control how we react to others and manage all that happens to and around us.  That should make you feel empowered; we always have choices, even if it does not feel like it immediately.

Change can be hard; it can feel like a rickety old bridge over a river of rapids that we must cross.  Again, the good news is, that transition, or bridge, is often the toughest part of the change.  If we can make it through that transition period, we can begin to adjust to the change(s) and thus learn, grow, and make modifications that make the change feel more normal.  So, where in the world do we begin when it can so easily feel overwhelming?  First, remember three important facts:

• all feelings are OK, it is what we do with them that matters;
• this time in our lives is temporary;
• and, you are not alone in this, we are all in this together! 

Then give your thoughts some thought (known as metacognition) …are you dwelling on the negatives, how hard this is, all that you are missing out on, and that you do not want to be in this situation?  Or, are you trying to find the good in every day and stay focused on those things, accepting what is, and remembering that this is not forever, it is for now.  You must decide if you want to survive or thrive during this or any other difficult time in your life and then choose your actions based on that decision.  Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer (Romans 12:12).

“Change is inevitable.  Growth is optional.”

~John Maxwell

If there was ever a time to learn to be in the moment, to stay present in today, now is that time.  If we think about all we must do, all that could happen, and how long we must endure these trying circumstances it is sure to make us feel overwhelmed.  Practice focusing on this moment and the choices you can make to thrive right now, in the midst of the trial!  When you begin to feel overwhelmed, take a powerful pause, do not let that feeling build up, allow yourself a few moments of silence and take some deep breaths, letting the oxygen flood your brain.  Let each breath out slowly as you remind yourself that you CAN do “this.”  Are your shoulders, hands, and feet relaxed?  If not, relax them and then feel the difference.  You can and should set goals and make plans, but live in what you have, this moment, today. 

Routines are important, especially when things feel more uncertain and scarier than usual.  It can be easy to stay in bed, but don’t.  Doing so will only add to negative feelings over time, it will leave you feeling isolated and can lead to feelings of hopelessness and depression.  Try to get up and go to bed about the same time every day, ensuring you get plenty of sleep.  Eat healthy, drink lots of water, and get exercise most of the time.  Shower and get ready for the day; find something to be enthusiastic and energized about.  Continue to learn each and every day, learning is such a valuable life skill, not just a school skill!  Read…let a good book take you to an exciting new place.  Balance time alone and time with others.  You will find throughout life that balance is key.  Doing any one thing most of the time will cause the other parts of your life to suffer.  Do all you can to stay safe: remain at home when you can, wash your hands often, wear a mask, and stay 6 feet from others when out in public; those are things you control.  If you watch the news, do so to stay informed but do not allow yourself to become fixated on the same information over and over.  Use the extra time you may have now for a new hobby or to get a few things on your to-do list done, things you did not have time for when the world was open for business as usual.  For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control (2 Timothy 1:7).   

Set goals, but always be sure to break them down into smaller, manageable steps.  Every journey begins with a single step.  Your dreams can only become a reality through planning and then acting on those plans.  As the saying goes, you need to plan your work and then work your plan!  Do not procrastinate for that adds to unnecessary pressure and stress.  The same way you break down your goals, you must break down any projects you have to do.  Anything can be achieved one small step at a time!  Decide to put in the effort to do your best every day, to be the best friend, son/daughter, sister/brother, mother/father, and neighbor you can be, to be the best teacher or student despite remote learning. Doing for others often makes us feel better, it takes the focus off of our own struggles and allows us to bring joy into the lives of others; it allows us to do our part to make the world a better place!  Put in the effort to do your absolute best without striving for the unattainable: perfection; personal growth is a lifelong process.

“Your only competition is the person you were yesterday.”

~Unknown Author

Lean on your loved ones and friends.  Do not isolate yourself.  Today staying in touch is easier than ever with Facetime, social media, and even online gaming.  Make the effort to reach out and stay engaged with others.  Initiate fun family time, play games, watch movies, start a new hobby together, and go for walks and bike rides.  Start a meaningful conversation with family and friends, share your feelings, remember we are all in this together!  Continue to laugh and have fun, a tough situation does not mean you should not enjoy your life.  Many activities we used to take part in can now be done online.  If you feel you need more support, many counselors have video sessions and can help you work through feelings of anxiety or depression that will not seem to go away through your own efforts.  Getting help when you need it is a strength NOT a weakness.  It supports you as you learn, grow, and change into the best version of you throughout your life!  Most importantly, when things start to feel overwhelming, lean on the Lord first and foremost.  Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path (Psalm 119:105).

Think of ways to take care of and nurture yourself!  Make time to do so every day.  Pray, lay your worries at the cross; meditate (there are many Apps. available to help you with this); journal; watch TED Talks or something else inspirational; listen to Podcasts on topics that interest you; watch a feel good movie; take a walk outside in nature, really take the time to smell the roses; do yoga and/or stretch your muscles; take a bath; focus on dismissing negative thoughts that pop into your mind; dream about and plan for fun activities you will participate in once we get through the COVID crisis; make a vision board for the life you desire and are working toward having; and make time to be with your family and friends every day, even if you cannot be with them physically.  Did you know you can take a virtual tour of many museums and even walk through the Grand Canyon on Google Earth? 

Remember that what you are doing right now in your life is all part of your purpose, it is all part of becoming the best version of you and living your best life; what we do each day builds the foundation for our future!  Take time to develop greater self-awareness, to give thought to your strengths, weaknesses, and values.  True self-worth must come from within, through knowing yourself and knowing who you are in Christ.  Know what you are capable of and that you can change your weaknesses into something better, if you choose to do so!  Get in the good habit of doing random acts of kindness for others.  If a compliment pops into your mind, give it.  Do NOT compare yourself to others since no one really knows what goes on in someone else’s life except the person living in it; everyone has struggles.

For I know the plan I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.

~Jeremiah 29:11

Life Applications:

>What can you choose to do right now to help you learn and grow each day, to thrive during this challenging time for us all?  Make a plan and start putting it into action!

>>Start a list of three things each day that you are grateful for, develop an attitude of gratitude.  The more you seek to see the positives in your life, the more you will find them, and the more you will see a positive shift in your attitude!

>>>Seek to do random acts of kindness and give compliments each day, put the focus on what YOU CAN DO to make the world a better right now, to be a light!

>>>>If you have not done so already, click on my Foundation tab and utilize the lists of strengths, weaknesses, and values to become more self-aware, remembering no quality or talent is fixed but rather all are malleable and can be changed into something better!