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That Little Bit Extra…

“The difference between ordinary and extraordinary is that little extra.”

~Jimmy Johnson

I have always encouraged and modeled for my kids to give that little bit extraevery day: to give 110% in all they do.  If you are going to do something, take the extra few minutes and do it well; to look over their notes from school every day whether there is a test or not; to be willing to help someone when they see a need, to just simply hold the door for someone behind them; to let someone out of a side street in traffic when driving; to be nice to a grouchy teacher they come in contact with throughout the day, giving them the benefit of the doubt and showing them grace; to tell others to have a nice day when they leave their presence; to be kind to a new kid or a kid who is alone, you never know what that person is going through and feeling; to give a dollar every time you are asked to donate at a store or restaurant or to someone begging for help on a street corner, at the end of a month you may have given $10. which will not break you but means a lot to those less fortunate or to a good cause.  Life experience has taught me THAT is what gets you an “A” instead of a “B” in school and in life!  With effort and practice most could achieve a hypothetical “B” in all they do, but it is that little bit extra that causes you to rise above the majority who are just doing what they must in life, that causes you to stand out and be a light to others. 

“Character is all you do when no one is watching.”

~Paul Rabil

I am not suggesting that you do any of this for the purpose of others looking highly upon you, for even if no one is around, God sees what we do all the time.  I guarantee it will leave you feeling good inside once you get in the habit of giving that little bit extra, that which you currently might feel like you have no time or energy for.  Sometimes in life we feel sad or out of sorts because we put too much time and energy into what we are feeling in the here and now, into what we lack, or into what others aren’t doing for us.  Giving to others takes the focus off ourselves and our problems.  It not only gives us a sense of satisfaction to worry about others but also gratitude for what we do have, which can be easily overlooked as we focus on all we want and do not have in our society of excess.

Pastor Craig Groeschel spoke one Sunday at my Church in late 2017, and I will never forget his incredibly powerful sermon.  He was talking about giving, and he mentioned all the comforts that many of us have that we take for granted in this country: multiple pairs of shoes for different activities and outfits; a stocked refrigerator; some days we go out to dinner where we order what we want and someone serves it to us; and a ‘house for our cars’ (a garage)!  These are things we do not give a thought to day in and day out, yet some have one pair of holey, dirty shoes with no extra activities and minimal clothes; some, many of whom are children, beg for food, eat out of garbage cans, or at soup kitchens…they are happy just to get that empty feeling out of their stomachs; and some live under bridges, in doorways, or in different shelters on different nights, if they are lucky, with only their feet to get them around.  Sadly, it is so very easy to focus on what is wrong as opposed all that is right.

“Develop an attitude of gratitude, and give thanks for everything that

happens to you, knowing that every step forward is a step toward

achieving something bigger and better than your current situation.”

~Brian Tracy

So, if you are one of the fortunate ones to have a family, even just one good friend, a home, clean water coming out of a faucet you turn on at will, power to keep your electronics charged and a light shining in every room, a thermostat so you can adjust your air conditioning and heat, a closet full of clothes with nothing to wear, and choices when you are hungry, you have been blessed much more than so many in our broken world.  What if we woke up and remembered all that we have that so many others don’t, and then we went out into the world and gave that little bit extra in all we did…what would our world look like?  How different would we feel about ourselves and life in general?  It is hard to be down in the dumps when we put the focus on what we have and what we are capable of, instead of what we don’t have and can’t do.  It is odd how it is so much easier for most to focus on our lack instead of our abundance, I am certainly guilty of this.  We are all given gifts and a purpose in this world.  It may not look like what we want it to, but if we are open to it, we will discover our unique gifts and purpose.  The unfortunate (and fortunate) thing is that in today’s world there is so much excess available, that we are in a constant race to get more, often forgetting about what we already have…having something vs. enjoying and appreciating what you have are two vastly different things!  Which do you tend to do more often?

“We are what we repeatedly do. 

Excellence, therefore, is not an act but a habit.”

~Aristotle

As with any change in life, getting up tomorrow and doing things differently, just a little better than we did today, changing old habits and beginning new ones, putting our focus on what is right and fixing, not complaining about, what is wrong, will take effort and practice.  We will need to be deliberate in our effort, grittiness, perseverance, resiliency, responsibility, intentionality, risk, consistency, and self-efficacy to get started and to keep going, even when we do not feel like it.  It will take those non-cognitive factors that we have control over, that guide 75% of what we achieve…it will begin with and require the choice to do so.  So, tomorrow wake up and choose to take the extra few minutes to pause here and there and give that little bit extra where you see the opportunity throughout your day.  Be a light in a dark, broken world. 

“Go the extra mile, because doing your best in this

moment puts you in the best place for the next moment.”

~Oprah

Life Applications:

>Think about the different areas of your life and list at least one thing you can do this week in each that is above and beyond what you are currently doing/your norm in each area, be specific!

Spiritual Life:

Family Life:

Relationships:

Personal growth and learning:

Health and fitness level:

Career:

Financial state:

Other, if you have one:

>>When you accomplish this week’s list, make a new one for next week, and then the week after that.  If you do not get to something, simply move it to the next week.  In no time, giving that little bit extra will be a (good) habit and part of who you are, your nature!

>>>Leave yourself Post-it notes on your bathroom mirror, in your car, or any place else you frequent as a reminder, you might write something as simple as, “Be intentional today,” or “What can I do,” or “Be the light.”  Without reminders, what is not a strong habit is easily forgotten!

>>>>Get ready to go through your day with your eyes, ears, mind, and heart wide open, with a heightened awareness of others needs and your blessings.  Remember, be intentional, act with purpose!  Write down your spontaneous acts of doing that little bit extra…

My name is Noelle (Rousseau) Picozzi. I have a Master’s Degree in Social Work from Barry University (Miami Shores, FL) and a Master’s Degree in Education from Le Moyne University (Syracuse, NY). I have worked with children, adolescents, families, and adults in a variety of settings since 1993 when I first became an active volunteer for my local rape crisis center. After 50 years in the Northeast, I currently reside in North Carolina with my husband and 3 children who are 18, 12, and 11; in September my first baby leaves the nest for college, which is certainly bittersweet! Many of the skills I learned in my academic and professional life, I have put to good use in the last 14 years as a stay-at-home mom; my husband, myself, and my 3 children all have ADHD/ADD and Anxiety to varying degrees. My life motto has always been, “Grow, Learn, and Change” for as long as I can remember; my book of choice has always been, self-help. I grew up as the youngest child of immigrant parents, my father was an alcoholic, I struggled with undiagnosed ADHD, and wore very thick glasses growing up in a time when being bullied was a dirty, shameful secret, I have lost my parents and 2 brothers; life started as a challenge and hasn’t stopped since. Needless to say, there aren’t many scenarios I have heard from clients, students, and friends that I cannot relate to in some way directly or indirectly. I have a lifelong passion for and commitment to self-growth, which probably started out of necessity/survival mode. I began my research on current educational trends in December shortly after I began substitute teaching and stumbled upon Carol Dweck and the Growth Mindset. Although my focus for this website is on the growth mindset in education, this way of thinking, feeling and acting applies to and can benefit all areas of life! Keep your eyes open for my blog (Coming soon! : ), my first book: The Growth Mindset Daily Journal, and lots of other growth mindset projects!