Conditions Will Never Be Perfect…

“Some people live in a bitter, angry, hate-filled world. 

Some people live in a friendly, caring, love-filled world. 

Same world…

~Jose N. Harris

Scripture:

Not that I have already obtained this or am perfect, but I press on

to make it my own, because Jesus Christ has made me his own.

~Philippians 3:12

Perspective:

How many times in your life have you said, “Everything is perfect?”  And how long did it stay in that perfect state?  Conditions in life are sometimes great, other times not so great, and many times somewhere in between.  Life is rarely perfect and when it is, it is bound to change (since life is everchanging) so cherish and enjoy those moments!  Despite this life rarely being perfect, God uses imperfect people and imperfect conditions to do great things!  And she gave birth to her firstborn son and wrapped him in swaddling cloths and laid him in a manger, because there was no place for them in the inn (Luke 2:7).  We do not need to be perfect (no one is) or have perfect conditions to make the absolute best of any situation and to achieve great things, to achieve our goals, to attain our best self and our best life.  Even the highest achievers have weaknesses, struggles, and adversity in their lives.  What allows them to be high achievers is their mindset and using those nine factors that each of us controls to shape our life.   

This year I used my growth mindset and the nine factors I established to help me reach a goal that I have been struggling to achieve and maintain for the past 13 years.  I can do all things through him who strengthens me (Philippians 4:13).  I often write about the fact that to accomplish our dreams we must set goals AND have steps under each that we work on almost daily in order to achieve every step, and thus attain each goal.  That is one piece of the puzzle, the effort or hard work and meaningful time invested, but we must also display endurance (grit), refuse to give up (perseverance), bounce back when we slip up (resiliency), use self-discipline and hold ourself accountable (responsibility), take some chances and step out of our comfort zone (risk), make purposeful choices (intentionality), continue to make a steady effort (consistency), and believe we “can do it,” even when doubts creep in (self-efficacy).  The goal I struggled with most over the last 13 years is a common one, to lose and keep off the 25 pounds I gained during my third and last pregnancy at age 39.   

Like many, I would “diet,” lose some (even all a few times) of the weight, and then go back to my old habits not long after reaching my goal or losing motivation (whichever came first) and guess what would happen…I would gain back some of, all, or more than the weight I had lost.  Only to re-set that goal for “next Monday” over and over, and over and over, until I would eventually start the process over yet again.  As much as I hated the way I felt, and even looked, the goal did not feel attainable, not for long anyways.  So clearly something needed to change!  Nineteen weeks ago, I started once again, but this time with a different approach, with a different mindset.  I began a new and improved lifestyle of healthy eating combined with regular exercise, not a diet.  Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men (Colossians 3:23). 

I had already seen the difference in how consistent exercise made me feel.  After my January 29^th hip replacement, I had to begin walking, which was something I always enjoyed…when I did it.  Five days after surgery I took my first walk outside, with my walker, my husband, my oldest son, and our dog.  That day I went around the block; I was tired but happy, the pain that had kept me down for months was gone!  I felt like I had a new lease on a mobile lifestyle, and I was not going to let that blessing go to waste.  I continued to walk 5-6 days a week, a little longer, farther, and faster each week.  Although I had not changed my eating habits (yet), I began to feel my muscles and endurance improve over time.  And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up (Galatians 6:9).  July was an extremely hot month and so I used that as an excuse to slack off, instead of making accommodations for the heat, such as getting up earlier and walking before it became too hot.  I made the choice (consciously or not, it was my choice) to prioritize sleeping in, after all, it was summer vacation and my kids were doing it, too.  When I did walk, I noticed a change in my stamina, and I did not like that at all after my 5-month building process.

Then, on July 29^th, exactly 6-months after my surgery, I was finally sick and tired enough of being sick and tired of feeling blah and squeezing into clothes that were two sizes bigger than my lowest “acceptable to me” size, despite all my walking.  Exercise alone may allow you to strengthen your muscles and your endurance, but it does not enable you to lose any real weight.  I made the decision to recommit, making regular exercise (walking 5-6 times a week) part of my weekly routine and to begin eating two healthy meals a day (over the course of 8 hours/“intermittent fasting”).  By eating healthy, I mean I committed to eating protein (mostly grilled lean meats and egg whites) and vegetables at both my meals, with an occasional piece of fruit mid-day.  I also began drinking eight bottles of water a day (about 135 ounces), beginning the moment I got up.  I vowed to cut out carbs most of the time, especially white flour and sugar, because I know, as much as I love them, they make me feel bloated and achy.  I did what I knew I should do instead of what I felt like doing in the moment.  Do you not know that you are God’s temple and that God’s spirit dwells in you? (1 Corinthians 3:16). 

My goal this time wasn’t to diet but rather to begin, and more importantly continue, a healthy lifestyle; there was no timeline, I just knew I wanted to feel healthy and at what weight I would be best able to do so.  And so, I began one day at a time.  If I wanted to go out to dinner, I did, and I would order lean grilled protein with a salad (dressing on the side, just dipping my fork for each bite, with no croutons or cheese) or a vegetable; this can be done anywhere if we are determined!  If I felt like having a drink or two a couple times a week, I did, just nothing sweet or creamy.  If I wanted a Latte at Starbuck’s (with 2% milk) a couple times a week, I had one.  The longer I stayed committed to my lifestyle changes, the better I felt, and so the more motivated I was to keep going.  I assessed my mistakes regularly, as well as why they were mistakes, but more importantly, I learned from them as I moved forward.  I set goals along the way for my weight and for my monthly exercise.  In September I added biking to my weekly exercise routine and in November I added lots of reps of light weights every three days to my routine.  I do one exercise for my bis, tris, chest, back, and shoulders and a minute plank, three times, every third day.  After just one month I can already feel a difference.  Our efforts DO add up, if we are consistent.  For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it (Hebrews 12:11).

To show you how consistent effort does add up over time…

After 9 months of exercising with my new hip I can now bike 15 miles or walk 5 miles, comfortably.  And, after 18 weeks and 2 days I reached my first major milestone in weight loss, losing a total of 27 pounds (slow and steady with 3 to-go).  I feel great, I am proud of my consistent efforts and what I have been able to accomplishment because of them, and I am committed to my new healthy lifestyle for the long-haul, and THAT is the only way I am going to maintain how I feel and look now.  If I did what I have always done and went back to my old habits I would gain the weight back in no time!  I had to change the way I viewed this goal.  I asked and then answered these questions: what is my goal, what do I need to DO and NOT DO to achieve that goal, and what behaviors will allow me to maintain my progress?  The answer was not a diet but rather a lifestyle change.  I now enjoy eating healthfully and exercising regularly.  When I allow myself a treat, I do so by choice and I enjoy it, knowing I will be back to my healthy lifestyle right after doing so.  On Thanksgiving I, like so many, overate and I felt uncomfortable.  I knew that was NOT the way I wanted to feel as my norm ever again.  I thank God every day for helping me to achieve my health goals and ask for his help in my continued success.  But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”  Therefore I will boost all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me (2 Corinthians 12:9).        

Life Applications:

>Define what your “best self” looks like.  The details are particularly important to define, so you know exactly what you are working toward and what work you must do to get there!  Consider your strengths and weaknesses (see the Foundation tab on the top of my home page for a list of each to help you do so).  How can you use your strengths to their fullest but also turn some of your weaknesses into strengths?  What qualities do you most admire in others and would like to work to emulate? 

>>Now, define what your “best life” looks like.  Again, the details are extremely important to identify, so you know what you are working toward and what work you must do to get there.  Consider the seven life areas: spiritual, family, relationships, health and fitness, growth and learning, professional, and financial (and “other” if you have one).  What will those areas look like when you are living your best life?  Make sure you focus on the things you control and can do, winning the lottery is a dream few people realize as is controlling someone other than yourself!

>>>Approach your goals more practically…what do you need to begin doing and what do you need to stop doing daily to achieve and maintain each of your goals?  Goal attainment requires a change in your daily habits!

“If you want different results, do not do the same things.”

~Albert Einstein